Celebrity news - Space dinosaurs

Susan Boyle, you know the one who dreamed a dream, is going to have a movie made out of her life story. But will it stick to the facts or will Hollywood play it fast and loose? Producers have yet to confirm whether the film will be a special effects spectacular featuring space dinosaurs and a cameo from Steven Seagal as a kung fu Simon Cowell. But we can only hope.

In other film news, Daniel Radcliffes from off of Harry Potter and your Goblets of Fire is going to play Sebastian Coe. My sources have been sketchy on details but I expect the movie will focus on Lord Coe's thrilling edge of the seat 1992 race to become Member of Parliament for Falmouth and Camborne.No word yet on space dinosaurs or Steven Seagal's role in all this.

And finally, Crazy Britney has done it again one more time. The singer behind the song 'Work Bitch', a jaunty number about border collies, has been used by the Merchant Navy to scare off Somali pirates. The Merchant Navy say it's because Britters is the perfect example of Western decadence and the pirates can't stand to be in earshot off it. Our pop up pretend Somali spokespirate disagreed saying, 'Aaah tis true we can't stand Britney but tis only cost we're massive fans of Christina Aguileraaaargh!'

Paul Stacey played this on his radio show. You can hear him every morning from 7 on Erewash Sound.